Mike, I plan to continue the meds as well, but the Celexa was just TOO much for me. Thanks so much for your response. I have met the nicest people here! Take care and I"ll keep in touch. Kelly

Hello Kelly, Sorry you are having such a rough time of it. I see many people here stopping their meds early into the treatment because of the side effects. With the Effexor I did have some side effects but they went away after several weeks at the desired doseage. Still I get chills and hot flashes but I tolerate them to avoid the depression and anxiety. I can tolerate the Xanax in doses of up to 1mg at a time without getting drowsy now. This is quite helpful if I want to chill out in the middle of the day. I can take a .5mg tab and take the edge off without falling asleep at my desk. I mainly use it to sleep at night. Im glad to know that my ramblings are helping some people other than myself! :) Writing messages here is good therapy for me but it is nice to see others gain from them as well. Although I have made what I consider to be great strides toward healing I know I still have work left to do and the easiest thing for me would be to just pretend that I am all better and go on. But I want to really lick this thing and not just put a band-aid on it. Good luck and please keep posting. Mike

Hi Mike! I am fairly new to the site and have been reading your messages. It is so inspiring to me. I have been dealing with panic attacks for about 6 months now, but only over the last 2 have I received medication and the official diagnosis. Mornings are also my worst time - I am shaky, worrisome and then the worry develops into anxiety, which develops into panic. I too have tried changing my routine, which has helped a little, but it is still tough by times. Just yesterday, I started a new from my physchiatrist - it is Xanax XR, which is brand new. It is an extended relief version of Xanax, which I was taking 4 times a day. So far, it seems to give me a more "level" feeling rather than the ups and down of the every 4 to 6 hour routine. We'll see how it works long term. I am on a very low dose, .5 mg a day, working toward a mg per day, but the drowsiness sometimes gets me with that much of it. I am also taking Lexapro for depression. I was taking Celexa and the shaking that went with it just added to my anxiety. The Lexapro is mirror image of Celexa, just that you get 40 mg of Celexa results with only 10 mg of Lexapro and side effects. So far, I have had no side effects from it. I will keep reading your posts and hope to chat with you more. I need all the support I can get right now! Kelly

Again this morning the pesky thought intruded. I woke early again and this one specific thought reared its head. Just when you think you have a handle on things ... Still, it isnt causing any real problems. Not even anxiety, just a little uneasiness. I am going to find a way to squash that little thought. It has annoyed me long enough. I actually become more upset at the thought being there than the thought itself causes. Go figure. It is like a pesky little mosquito that doesnt bite you but just buzzes around your ears making that obnoxious sound. I had an idea this morning on the way to work. It is based on a Pavlovian type response. I will pick a subject that I can deal with like fixing the sink or some other task that needs to be done but I have been putting off. Then whenever this negative thought begins to bug me I would immediately switch over to the "task thought". After a number of times this should become a conditioned response and would happen without any effort on my part. Sort of like Pavlov's dogs salivating when he rang the bell. Im not sure this will work but it could be the finishing touch I need. I have made great progress using many different methods, now I can see a finish line but I just need that one more key to get there. Sort of like dieting. I lost 40 lbs in the last year. I want to lose maybe 10 more. They are the hardest to lose. I equate this to the final thought I cant seem to shake completely. Work to be done yet. Still hammering. Mike

Tuesday (8th) seemed to be a day of rejection for me. My psychiatrist called and cancelled my appointment about an hour before I was supposed to be there. I think I should charge her a 50 dollar cancellation fee! :) Then my therapist had to shuffle my appointment around. I still got in to see her but I had to change my schedule around which generated a little stress. On the good side I had two meetings at work cancelled as well so I guess it was a wash. The rest of the week was great. No anxiety and I felt wonderful. But...Saturday and Sunday I woke up and had a brief encounter with some negative thoughts. Nothing major but a tad disconcerting as Sunday's encounter seemed to last longer than Saturday's and my concern is of course that a pattern is developing and the frequency and duration of the episodes will gradually increase. I was able to dismiss the thoughts quickly and change tracks to some other subject matter but the troublesome thoughts would pry their way back in and force me to dismiss them again. This level of discomfort is acceptable to me. I consider it more a nusiance than a real problem. But...the anxiety that is caused by the fear of it escalating is a concern to me. I will do some more concentrated work on this today in an effort to throw up a sufficient roadblock. I suppose a good metaphor would be that over the past few months I have been slowly building up a dam on my river. No matter how big I build the dam I still have to let some water pass through or the dam will break and ruin all the work I have done. I think I will develop a method of allowing the river to simply flow freely and not have a dam at all. Even though I find that using the dam (stopping the negative thoughts) is helpful, not having the resivoir seems like it would be a good idea. Maybe I need to change my dam into a water purification plant. A place where I confine the negative thoughts breifly and through therapy, medication and behavior modification I filter the water and let it flow right back out, never allowing the tanks to fill. Dirty water in, clean water right back out. Still every once in a while Im going to need to work on the filter. It is un-realistic to think that I can have a "stress free" existance. What I must do is practice my methods of

At first I experienced slight nausea. In order to keep the nausea at bay I would put food in my belly. I began to gain some weight so I started to break my meals up into smaller portions and then snack in between. The nausea went away in a week but returned each time I changed doseage. I have not suffered the nausea for several weeks now. What I am experiencing now are occasional chills and some hot flashes where I sweat quite a bit. These are anoying but not so much so that I would stop using the drug. In fact, it is a very small trade off to lose the anxiety. It also seems to cause me to be restless and not sleep as well as I had been. Again...a small price to pay. Other than that, I feel great and have to give at least part of the credit to the Effexor. I also do meditation, read about anxiety, use a therapist and use 1mg of Xanax each night to sleep. Good luck, I hope this helped. Mike

Mike..... I'm trying to get as much info. on Effexor and Lexapro. I have tried Lexapro (5mg) for a couple of days, I remember not having any side effects except feeling panicky (it could have been in my head though) That scared me so I stopped. I've never tried Effexor. I'm thinking of trying one or the other.... I can't afford to take anything that will make me lose weight, cause I'm naturally thin and it's hard to keep weight on me. I would like to know what you've experienced good or bad. I just need some input ....PLEASE

Well, I woke early again this morning. I guess this isnt so bad really, it gives me time to do my meditation and relax my mind before getting up to begin the day. I suppose I should put a positive spin on it and look at it as "alone time". I seldom have "alone time" with the kids always needing attention and then wanting to spend time with my wife. Maybe this additional 45 minutes in the morning is a blessing in disguise. Today I visit the psychiatrist in the morning and the therapist in the afternoon. I guess my brain will be sore this evening! :) Yesterday was un-eventful....just the way I like it! I still read my books every once in a while and I listen to the meditation tapes while falling asleep and when I wake up every day. I have not suffered the weight gain from the Effexor that seems to be a problem for many people. I am thankful for that as I have been working very hard on keeping the 35 lbs I lost from coming back. I can maintain my diet and still avoid the medication side effects. I just space the food out in smaller, more frequent doses. Today is going to be a great day for me. Make it one for you too! Mike

Yes, I am quite pleased wih my progress to this point. I am most pleased with developing the ability to see it coming and nip it in the bud before it becomes severe. I put a lot of effort into working on the skills I am using to keep anxiety from effecting my life too severely and it does seem to be paying off! I came to the realization that this thing is not going to simply vanish and that I must find a way to actually deal with it. That was a crucial moment. From then on out most of the work was developing the coping methods and trying various things to see what worked and what did not. I am still learning. Mike

Mike, In reading through your thread, It seems to me that you are making steady progress.